I am currently taking an online course on the book of Galatians. One of my recent assignments resonates with what I’m going through and all that God has taught me in this season.

The Galatians church was turning back to their old ways of becoming slaves under the Law. They had experienced conversion, and Paul spoke earlier that they had been baptized in Christ and had believed in the Gospel preached by Paul. Paul worked hard and labored over the church, and yet they were still consumed with the idea of earning salvation through works and not by faith in Christ.  They disregarded what Christ did on the cross and were turning back to their old ways of becoming slaves under the Law. Paul was beginning to fear all of his work with the church was worthless.

When ministry fails, we have to look within ourselves and also the circumstances surrounding us in determining what went wrong, and how we fix it. It’s so easy for Christians to turn back to their old ways, simply because ministry is difficult. We then begin to question ourselves and our mission, often forgetting why we’re here in the first place. We can say, “We didn’t have the tools needed for success.” Sometimes it feels like we’re asked to dig a well, but we don’t have a shovel. However, we must remember that God equips the ill-equipped. We also have to be careful of truly acknowledging why we’re here in the mission field. Is the ministry about making us feel good about ourselves or is it about glorifying God and sharing the Gospel to nonbelievers? The Galatians were turning back to their “good works” in justifying themselves before God. We can never be righteous before our Heavenly Father without Jesus. We’ve experienced firsthand what the transformation feels like when Jesus comes into our hearts. The test is to remain firm in our faith, especially when things become difficult. Often God brings us into situations to grow us as a person because sometimes our hearts need to be refined for divine change to happen as we grow in our faith.

 As a follower of Christ, we too experience labor pains through our work in ministry. Although there is so much joy when we see our fruits leading to the conversion of souls, living a Christ-like life places us in uncomfortable and often difficult situations. Truthfully, we sometimes ask ourselves, is it all worth it? That’s why God consistently encourages us to keep our eyes focused on eternity and look beyond our circumstances.

     Recently, I am in a season of wondering if this is all worth it. I find myself very lonely and not as joyful as I would desire to be. I went to the Lord and honestly told Him if this is what my life is going to be like if I decided to become a missionary for the long-term, I don't know if I can do it.

But that’s just it; I can’t do it alone but having Christ in me can overcome the challenges I face. My life is also not about me, but instead, it’s about being all that God calls me to be. I’m willing to walk through whatever it takes for a tiny ray of God’s light to shine in France. I knew it would be hard, but this is something I’ve never experienced. I’m thankful for every moment here, even the hard ones.